Monthly Archives: March 2008

Zelling Out

Guido slides hard into bed last night, spikes high. “Baseball season starts tomorrow,” she says. “Do you care?” Well, yeah, I do. I love baseball. I despise what has happened to the Marlins. Ownership of that team has no business … Continue reading

Posted in Playing With Balls | 5 Comments

Shit Happens

“Life is what happens when you’re making other plans.” Yeah yeah, cliche city. Anyway, I had all this good stuff planned, but now I can’t get to it… indulge me while I borrow a post from another blog, exactly one … Continue reading

Posted in Golden Oldies (Deja Vu All Over Again) | 1 Comment

Who Farted?

“He’s a class guy, and class gets rewarded.” —Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria, on Jeff “Mr. Marlin” Conine Miami Hurled No argument, just the unsettling observation that praise from as odious a source as this one could be construed as an … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 2 Comments


Nice moment from the Supreme Court: The standard for competence to stand trial, formulated in a 1960 Supreme Court decision, Dusky v. United States, is fairly basic. It requires that a defendant have “sufficient present ability to consult with lawyer … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 6 Comments


Hadn’t heard much from my gambler friend Duck Diamonds since he abruptly took a leave of absence — that’s industry lingo for fducking a hostile “client/investor” — but he sent me a post card from wherever he is with the … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 6 Comments

Dude Deals Duds

[T]o arm the Afghan forces that it hopes will lead this fight, the American military has relied since early last year on a fledgling company led by a 22-year-old man whose vice president was a licensed masseur. With the award … Continue reading

Posted in News From the Nation's Dicktip | 5 Comments

Bring Out Your Dead and Run for Congress

Turns out there’s more to this Kevorkian candidacy than originally reported. My source is my doctor – well, not MY doctor, really: it’s the veterinarian to whom Guido and I have been taking our animals for some years. Jack Kevorkian, … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 4 Comments

Talk About “Breaking News”…..

…..can you imagine the birth process here? An Oregon transgendered man who used to be a woman says he is five-months pregnant. Thomas Beatie, who’s expecting a girl, tells his story in a first-person account published in ‘The Advocate’ magazine. … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 1 Comment

P.U. in PA

“I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.” — Will Rogers Funny guy, that Will, but his mama dressed him funnier. Up in Pennsyltucky, the Keystone State, they’re registering voters for the primary as … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 7 Comments

Urban Legends Come to Life

Minneapolis, MN — The family of a 6-year-old girl whose intestines were partially sucked out by a Minnesota swimming pool drain last year says the child has died.[The girl] was injured on June 29 when she sat on a pool … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 4 Comments