Just Three Excitable Boys

When I heard about this on the radio, I figured it had something to do with Jenna Bush getting married. And it still might.

Houston — Three Texas teens have been arrested after police say one told them that they had dug up a skull and fashioned it into a bong to smoke pot. Houston Police were interviewing one of the teens about a stolen debit card when he allegedly blurted out the story.

Authorities say the teens dug up Willie Simms’ grave in what is most likely a 19th century veterans grave yard, broke off the skull and smoked marijuana from it. Police were led to the grave site where they found a knocked over headstone and a water-filled hole more than four-feet deep.

Two of the teens, who are each 17, are charged with misdemeanor abuse of a corpse. A third, who is 16, is in the juvenile justice system. — ktla.com

All together: every joke you can think of using the words “head,” “getting head,” and “head shop.” We’ll wait.

Me, I’m amazed at yet another case of mistreating American veterans.

In my day, we fashioned dope delivery systems out of whatever we could find, including hollowed-out cigarettes, toilet paper rolls, aluminum foil, bottle caps, matchbook cover cardboard, and the Wall Street Journal editorial page. The last was at a meeting of the Campus Young Republicans, and the irony was duly noted at the time.

I also recall a party — I think — where the host blew lungfulls of hippie lettuce smoke into his Doberman’s mouth, inspiring guests to French kiss the poor beast. It was a different gathering in the same general era where I watched as several very stoned young ladies applied hash oil to each others’ salty armpits and licked them clean. That was the talk of the summer. (Sorry — YouTube was a distant invention.)

But a human skull? A century old moldering human skull? Cheech and Chong meet Frankenstein. Smoke Gets in Your Eyes (Sockets).

“I suppose they figured it was a good idea at the time,” a repulsed spokesman for the police offered. “But today they’re probably askin’ themselves, ‘What the hell was I thinkin’?'”