Monthly Archives: June 2008

T.M.I.

Had your colonoscopy yet? Here’s mud in yer eye. The preparation for a colonoscopy consists of taking medication that projects everything not nailed down tight inside your body out your ass. Most of the time, this medication is a standard … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 6 Comments

You Say To-MAH-to (I Spell Tomatoe)

The U.S. Department of Agriculture has deemed Florida-grown tomatoes safe and free from the salmonella outbreak impacting tomatoes in other states, Florida Agriculture and Consumer Services Commissioner Charles Bronson said. The Florida tomato industry generated $464 million in cash receipts … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | 5 Comments

High Roller

Atlantic City, NJ. – A woman in a motorized wheelchair slammed into a hotel elevator, forcing the doors to open, and then fell about 30 feet down the shaft early Saturday, a city fire official said. It took firefighters about … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 4 Comments

Kill Whitey

Over the weekend I found myself at a party listening to one of these earnest, kind, committed types insisting on the sanctity of respecting other cultures and religions. Thanks to the tequila, I couldn’t quite remember the Mencken quote (“We … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 15 Comments

Looks Good, Smells Like Ass

Guys! Here’s how you can save some sweat and gym time with a single application of this ordinary over-the-counter product! New York bouncer, blogger and author Rob Fitzgerald has noticed a trend among many of the macho young men waiting … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 8 Comments

I Saw You

Here’s a photo of the Democratic nominee-designate, caught giving a Nazi salute to terrorist supporters standing in front of an Islamofascist mosque. Thanks to the Clinton campaign for providing both photo and editorial research. Oh, but she endorses him anyway. … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 3 Comments

Stuck in Park

First of all, thanks for the amazing response to Tuesday’s posts, especially the one about Secretariat Jessica Parker. I found that website nothing short of astonishing (as well as accurate). Haven’t seen anything quite like that since the kitler post, … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 10 Comments