Monthly Archives: December 2008

How Guido Got Soap In Her Ear

The telephone rings rather early, while I’m in the shower at the precise moment when I have a bunghole full of soap.  I know who it is and I need to grab it (the phone, not the soap in my … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 6 Comments

Happy Birthday

Ludwig van Beethoven December 16, 1770 – March 26, 1827 portrait by Joseph Karl Stieler, 1820

Posted in People Who Died, Died | 7 Comments

Long Live Mrs. O’Leary

I’m relaxing in the Liquor & Rubber Balls Sports Bar and Pants Pressed While You Wait (LRB’s), having a beer with Vera Lu Senz, sportswriter and North Side Chicago native.  Midwesterner to the core, she congratulates me again on the … Continue reading

Posted in The Adventures of Don Tequila | 14 Comments

The Home Front (a continuing series)

The latest in a long-running dispute over the City of Hollywood’s paying huge money to hire clods incapable of picking up trash, brush, and recyclables.  From my email this morning: Ladies/Gentlemen: I phoned Wednesday morning 12/10 regarding a mess left … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 5 Comments

Congressional Report Labels Ronald Dumsfeld “An Asshole”

Now that John McCain is no longer a tool of the ‘Pub party political machine, he has reverted to the man of integrity he was when we used to like him. WASHINGTON – A report released Thursday by leaders of … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 11 Comments

Chapter 11-M

Aligning himself with a national trend, President Bush announced today that his administration would file for bankruptcy at the end of the week.  Moral bankruptcy, that is. Addressing the Washington media, White House spokeshole Phil McCrack explained that, “After the … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 4 Comments

Orka Winfrey Is Fat

And evidently millions of people give a damn. Her Lardship’s words have been collected and recited as if they were pearls of wisdom; her blessings cause careers to soar or crash in flames. Zillions of people, the vast majority of … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 16 Comments