Sting Stang Stung

Terrorist plot?  Smuggler?  Illegal insect immigrant?

Forty-four-year-old Douglas Herbstsommer of Gilbert, Ariz., wasn’t seriously injured Sunday when he was stung by a venomous Arizona bark scorpion while going through his luggage.  Southwest spokeswoman Marilee McInnis says the Arizona bark scorpion and five baby scorpions hitched a ride from Phoenix to Indianapolis in Herbstsommer’s luggage.

The scorpions were killed after the flight landed and the jetliner was fumigated as a precaution. — Fox News

Anticipate a media release from PETA any minute now.   Mom and the innocent five stingers should have been afforded more respect.  Bad enough they were relegated to luggage class upon boarding, let alone executed at the end of their journey.  Even JetBlue isn’t that callous.

blackscorpionDVDWorst thing along these lines I ever encountered on an airplane was a scurrying cockroach, but after all this time in south Florida, that didn’t faze me.  Until it donned a cap and headed toward the cockpit.  Turned out it was the co-pilot.  USAir, of course.

Actually, when you consider the number of people and quantity of luggage handled by the hairline industry, not to mention the variety of venues routinely visited, it’s astonishing there aren’t MORE incidents of this nature.  There sure as hell would be if germs were visible.  I’ve heard airplanes described as flying Petri dishes.  Passengers aren’t parasites, we’re ingredients.  Supplements.  Catalysts!

Obscure Reference Department

Personally, when I fly, I always pack a mongoose.  Never know when I’ll encounter a snake on its way to hiking the Appalachian Trail.

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4 Responses to Sting Stang Stung

  1. Head Lice says:

    This is a perfect example of why we never fly any other way than carry-on.

  2. Ted End says:

    Nowhere is it explained why this nutjob packed live scorpions to begin with. I hope the airlines send him a bill for the fumigation they did.

  3. Helen Highwater says:

    I was on a commuter flight from Hamilton OH to Syracuse NY when a mouse ran down the aisle. Poor little thing. I told the bored flight attendant, and she looked at me like I probably had the DTs. “I’ll tell the pilot,” she said.

  4. Living Will says:

    Ted End: Get help.

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