Baby Face

I come across this account while checking for some late baseball scores:

San Antonio, TX- A woman charged with murdering her 3 1/2-week-old son used a knife and two swords to dismember the child and ate parts of his body, including his brain, before stabbing herself in the torso and slicing her own throat, police said Monday.

[Police Chief William] McManus…said Sanchez apparently ate the child’s brain and some other body parts.  She also decapitated the infant, tore off his face, and chewed off three of his toes before stabbing herself.

McManus described the crime scene as so grisly that police officers barely spoke to each other while looking through the house.  Parts of the child were missing, including pieces that Sanchez allegedly ate.

“It’s too heinous for me to describe it any further,” McManus said. — philly.com

According to one account, Sanchez is offering the “devil made me do it” defense.  But reached for  comment, while admitting that he enjoys his frequent visits to Texas, the Devil denies any part of this one.  “I’m pure evil,” he told reporters. “This is just sick.”

He also reaffirmed his loyalty to the Dallas Cowboys.

9049-Clipart-Picture-Of-A-Chefs-Hat-Mascot-Cartoon-Character-Holding-A-Knife-And-ForkThe Pro-Life Movement, also active in Texas, does not plan to get involved.  “The baby was 3 ½ weeks old,” a spokesman explained.  “Four weeks ago or more, before it was born, we might have had something obnoxiously moralistic to contribute as we often do.  But we reserve our love and hugs for fetuses.  Once they’re born, we don’t give a shit about babies.”

Authorities speculate that the missing body parts will turn up in an autopsy, assuming the alleged cannibal/killer dies.  A website “WhatGoesWithToes.com,” accepting wagers on other stomach contents (white wine vs red wine; lite beer vs regular beer, etc.) was taken off-line within hours of its announcement in the on-line gourmet magazine Bubba BBQ.

So far, no accusations of racism or police mishandling have been raised, but it’s possible that every goddam expert and their brother-in-law on the subject (none of whom were present) has already grown exhausted after endlessly airing out their opinions all weekend long.  Besides, this isn’t Cambridge.

UPDATE: 3 PM

The sad story about a San Antonio mother who dismembered her 3 1/2-week-old son now has the father of the dead child saying she deserves to be executed.

Scott W. Buchholtz, who called his son “baby Scotty,” told the San Antonio Express-News on Monday that 33-year-old Otty Sanchez should “pay the ultimate price” in the death of Scott Wesley Buchholtz-Sanchez.

Relatives of the mother say she was diagnosed with schizophrenia and postpartum psychosis. — Wacotrib.com

I can’t imagine a more appropriate family for the cover of next month’s Family Values Magazine.  Caption: “Hold the Onions — These Tears Come Naturally.”

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10 Responses to Baby Face

  1. 'Postrophe says:

    Man oh man…..she must have been HUNGRY.

  2. Barbara Ganousch says:

    Congratulations on posting the sickest, most grotesque story of the year. I appreciate the omission of photographs.

  3. Ray Ed Gneck says:

    Your shot at the pro-life movement is completely inappropriate. Suppose we turned it around and said that the pro-abortion people defended this horrible murder because it’s a late-late term abortion? Would that be alright with you?

  4. Living Will says:

    If there’s a God, the mother dies.

  5. Ruh Roh says:

    “What goes with toes”? How about Jam?

  6. Hose B says:

    Waco, huh. ‘Nuff said.

  7. Kent Standit says:

    “Baby Scotty” is now called “Baby Sweetbreads.”

    As for mom, now that she’s had her last meal, she’s ready for her just desserts.

  8. ya'gotta'guessit says:

    Worst squat-blog, ever – like a ’70s Filipino horror movie.

  9. anonymous says:

    The Pro-Life Movement, also active in Texas, does not plan to get involved. “The baby was 3 ½ weeks old,” a spokesman explained. “Four weeks ago or more, before it was born, we might have had something obnoxiously moralistic to contribute as we often do. But we reserve our love and hugs for fetuses. Once they’re born, we don’t give a shit about babies.”

    This is low even for you. Your blatant and sick attempt to put words into the mouths of pro-life people is disgusting. As I said you are scraping the bottom of the barrel. Shame on you, Squathole!

  10. Squathole says:

    Looks like I hit an Anonymous nerve. Are you the only one who doesn’t recognize this as satire? Besides, the pro-life folks don’t need me to put stupidity and hypocrisy in their mouths, they do a first-rate job on their own.

    You might have a look at the comment offered by my old antagonist Ray Edd Gneck (3rd one in the thread, above). He can take it and give it right back.

    Ya’gotta’guessit: Excellent evaluation, but just wait until tomorrow!

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