Monthly Archives: April 2010

Rush Was Right

Sometimes he gets it so right and so early, it sounds all wrong.  But back in May, 2004, when just about the entire world was condemning American soldiers’ conduct in an Iraqi prison – even Monkey Boy was at least … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 11 Comments

Metamorphosis

Monday is Day One of my conversion to lesbianism.  How has it come to this?  Let’s roll back the film. After hours of research and personal interviews, Guido and I determine that the best course of treatment for my prostate … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 9 Comments

Out on (and Of) a Limb

Why bother to write fiction when you can just cut and paste stuff like this? Jacoby Laquan Smith says he will turn himself in to St. Paul police this week for what must be the most unmanly crime on record: … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 9 Comments

Arizon-Out

In  a bid to become the reining leader among states in the category of Clowns to the Left of Me, Jokers on the Right, Arizona contributes the following: Rep. Judy Burges [R=Skull Valley] amended Senate Bill 1024 to include a … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 10 Comments

It’s 5:00 Right Here! on Earth Day Eve

Today – Wednesday – promises to be a Very Good Day.  At 4 this afternoon I will wander into the appropriate office at work and sign papers effecting my separation from my job. It’s not quite a resignation, nor is … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 8 Comments

Cover Your Tits for Muhammad!

The experts tell us otherwise, but instinctively it seems like we’ve seen a plethora of natural disasters lately.  No, I don’t mean the return of Courtney Love.   I refer to this belching Icelandic volcano going on and doing what most … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 4 Comments

Major League Hurler

Sunday here in Hollywood it’s raining so relentlessly I give up at lunch time and wander over to The Liquor and Rubber Balls Sports Bar and 1-Hour Martinizing to watch the Phillies/Marlins game.  Don Tequila, tending bar this afternoon, draws … Continue reading

Posted in Playing With Balls | 7 Comments

Wipe Out

EUREKA, Mo. – The outer road along Interstate 44 near Six Flags St. Louis is freshly paved – with asphalt made from recycled swine manure.  It is believed to be the first time asphalt has been created from swine manure. … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 4 Comments

Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics

It’s Tax Day Eve!  Do you know where your accountant is? According to Faux News, Americans LOVE the Eye Are Ess.  Hard to believe, right, unless you compare their loves and hatreds with other high-profile entities.  Looky here: 10. – … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 24 Comments

The Long and Short Of It

Meinhardt Raabe, who played the Munchkin coroner in “The Wizard of Oz” and proclaimed in the movie that the Wicked Witch of the East was “really most sincerely dead,” has died. He was 94.  His caregiver, Cindy Bosnyak, said Raabe … Continue reading

Posted in News From the Nation's Dicktip, People Who Died, Died | 5 Comments