Monthly Archives: October 2010

Dead Boy

Wow.  Beaver’s mom. Richie’s dad, and now this! CHULA VISTA, Calif. — Johnny Sheffield, who played the character Boy in the Tarzan movies of the 1930s and ’40s, has died at age 79.  His wife, Patty Sheffield, told the Los … Continue reading

Posted in People Who Died, Died | 4 Comments

Not Suitable for Work (Or Life Generally)

Staying awake into the wee hours is pretty tough these days ESPECIALLY when the reason is to watch a ball game where my team loses in agonizingly inch-by-inch fashion.  Now we’re down 3-1 in a best of 7 series.  In … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 13 Comments

The Barter System

Police were searching Tuesday night for a Ridley Township [PA] man who allegedly stole five leather coats from Kohl’s and fled the scene, leaving his two-year-old daughter behind. Andrew Surplus, 39, was stopped by a security guard outside the main … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 3 Comments

She Knows the Second One Better

Must be one of those future “citizen legislators” the teabaggers are so fired up about. WILMINGTON, Del. – Republican Senate nominee Christine O’Donnell of Delaware on Tuesday questioned whether the U.S. Constitution calls for a separation of church and state, … Continue reading

Posted in NIMBY | 11 Comments

The Disappeared

Among the thieves who stole alcohol from a liquor store on Hallandale Beach Boulevard were women who can be seen on surveillance video concealing an expensive bottle of cognac under their skirts, WSVN-Ch. 7 reported. Detectives told WSVN that as … Continue reading

Posted in News From the Nation's Dicktip | 5 Comments

Roll ‘Em

This one is hard to figure out. First of all, it isn’t clear what ramp the sign references.  This being south Florida, it’s possible whoever posted the sign thinks the word “ramp” means “pillar” or “column,” but in that case, … Continue reading

Posted in News From the Nation's Dicktip | 2 Comments

Beans Beans Good for the Heart

Sorry – can’t resist! U.S. Hispanics can expect to outlive whites by more than two years and blacks by more than seven, government researchers say in a startling report that is the first to calculate Hispanic life expectancy in this … Continue reading

Posted in News From the Nation's Dicktip | 9 Comments

The Grinch Steals Cancer

Evidently October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  Save the Ta-Tas.  Save A Life — Grope Your Wife.  Kiss a Survivor Today – but be careful who.  And where. Overall, who would be against something that raises barge loads of dollars … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 13 Comments

A Manly Sport

I owe this one to my good friend Otis the Chauffeur, who, in an exchange of emails discussing media coverage of the recently concluded NLDS between the Phillies and the Cincinnati Reds, came across a reference to what is evidently … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 7 Comments

Not My Round

Seems like every giant teevee has a different ball game, each surrounded by bickering fans.  But Don Tequila, working tonight as bouncer for the Liquor and Rubber Balls Sports Emporium and Animal Shelter, is musing instead over a discarded copy … Continue reading

Posted in The Adventures of Don Tequila | 5 Comments