Good News for Sun Freaks

Earth ‘to get second sun this year’ as supernova turns night into day  — Daily Mail

Betelgeuse is about to melt down, some say as early as 2012, doubling our tanning opportunities.  Look for the following phenomena:

  • Spike in new skin protection products brought to market using the word “Betelgeuse.”
  • Media releases from environmentalists linking the development to global warming.
  • Media releases from environmental deniers linking environmentalists to insanity.
  • New crush of end-of-the-world flavored evangelists.
  • Brand-new neuroses identified by therapists, attributing double-sun phenomenon to neurological and behavioral abnormalties; subsequent development of new and expensive medications rushed to market and made insurance-eligible.
  • Lots of bad puns.

In sum, life goes on.

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1 Response to Good News for Sun Freaks

  1. Tanya Hyde says:

    Two suns. Twice the tanning rays. If only!

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