Power to the Poople

Digest (* snurk snurk * ) the following:

Laurie Guevara-Stone of Carbondale-based Solar Energy International recently approached Carbondale’s parks and recreation commission about installing a gas lamp in one of the city’s two dog parks that would be fueled by methane from dog waste.

The project would be modeled after the Park Spark Project, which began at a dog park in Cambridge, MA.  Park Spark installs a methane digester in public parks to collect dog waste and transform it into methane.  The methane collection system involves a pair of chambers or tanks, which can be installed either above or below ground.  Dog owners pick up their dog’s waste using biodegradable bags and drop it into a “feeding tube” that goes to the first chamber.

In addition to its demonstration value, the project would also divert dog waste from the landfill and make use of the resulting methane on site.  – Denver Post

It’s called an “aerobic digester”(but it doesn’t come when you call it), and its application isn’t new or revolutionary.  If you’re up on the news, you probably know that.  After all, Goldmine Sachs, Bernie Madoff, and Morgan Stanley have been selling shit for years.

Guido spots this and immediately wants one.  After all, we recycle newspaper – remember, we have 7-day subscriptions to both the Miami Hurled and New York Times – plastic and tin cans (5 cats and 1 dog go through a lot of containers), bottles (um, never mind), and lately, with the addition of the composter, everything that used to go down the garbage disposal except silverware and finger tips, but that wasn’t supposed to anyway.  Why not dog waste?

Well, there is the harvesting problem, but then again, with 6 squat-and-shit animals not counting the 2-legged variety, we end up doing that anyway.  The very same plastic bags in which the newspapers arrive become the sacks we use to patrol the grounds – one of the great pleasures of pet owning is picking up their soft, rancid, wet shit, you know; makes it all worthwhile – and the irony of those bags’ existence isn’t lost on me.  (Got it?  They start as media shit-wrappers and end up as shit-wrappers for, well, shit.)  So we’re mostly all the way there already.

I have always regretted that we can’t harness the enormous power of my own methane-production.  My vegetable-centric diet ensures consistent, impressive production.  (As  does this blog.)  But now, Guido has more or less given me the green light to squat and shit in my own back yard! Among other benefits, like saving on the water bill, this will certainly enhance the property values in the neighborhood.

What can brown do for you?

Sign me up.  Aaaaaah.

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5 Responses to Power to the Poople

  1. at the lamp store later that day …. “Ok Miss, we have high and lower powered lamps….do you want ‘shit” or “shit light ?”

  2. Piles says:

    If this technology was made more widely available, I imagine the entire mid-Atlantic region could be powered just by the methane produced in Washington DC.

  3. Ted Larsen says:

    This is a wunnerful thang.We have 10 cats, 23 horses and 7 incontinent relatives and a homeless guy living here. We power the whole house and sell the excess to the gas company. Last year we made $23,489, but the EPA probe continues.

    PROFOUND QUESTION OF THE DAY: If you give a homeless person a home, is he/she still homeless?

  4. Dawgbowl says:

    Fascinating! If this technology is applicable to human waste, then homeless people will have another marketable commodity other than their own blood. Save Our Cities!

  5. guido says:

    Squats, you got it wrong again…..I said you can FART all you want out in the back yard, not shit.

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