I fully expect that after today I’ll lose a considerable number of readers, as so many will be off to heaven and eternal peace, leaving miserable sinners like myself behind to confront horrible deaths and the destruction of the earth.
The May 21st End of the World prediction only applies to those who will be saved on Judgment Day 2011 in the Rapture. Those who aren’t saved in the May 21 Rapture will suffer a different fate, and an End of the World date 5 months after May 21st.
May 21st Judgement Day is going to be the decisive day when Jesus returns for the Rapture. True believers will be brought to Heaven, and that will be the End of The World for the approximately 3,000,000 people will be saved, according to Harold Camping.
The remaining people on earth that are not saved by Jesus in the May 21 Rapture will be sentenced to 5 months of torment under the rule of Jesus during the End of Days. The End Times will cause anarchy, chaos, disasters, and the end of civilization as we know it. — judgementday2011.com
The second paragraph is a trifle convoluted (and “Judgment” misspelled) but you get the idea. The Good People get a ticket out, leaving us assbucket sinners to perish under the direction of Hay-zeus himself.
So who’s the holy braniac behind this idiocy?
Harold Camping, 89, [who] previously made a failed prediction that Jesus Christ would return to Earth in 1994….[is the] head of the Christian radio network Family Stations Inc. [He] says that he is sure an earthquake will shake the Earth on May 21, sweeping true believers to heaven and leaving others behind to be engulfed in the world’s destruction over a few months.
“We know without any shadow of a doubt it is going to happen,” Camping told Reuters.
His Family Radio has 66 U.S. stations and broadcasts in more than 30 languages through international affiliates. — Reuters
Evidently this is your typical chancel-prancing bible harpie, somewhere between senile and stupid, who convinces zillions of like-minded cross-kissing sycophants to take him seriously enough to send checks. The mob, Seminole Tribe, and Federal Reserve don’t have as lucrative a racket as this putz.
I try like hell to get somebody to take my bet this won’t happen, but nobody with enough money to wager is idiotic enough to accept. I even call professional gambler Duck Diamonds to see if he had any action. “Grow the fuck up,” he tells me.
The fact is, I’m delighted. Reducing the human herd by shipping off 3 million sanctimonious imbeciles sounds like a good thing. Don’t let the clouds hit you in the ass on your way up and out.
Mr. Camping didn’t specify the time of day this mass exodus will happen, but we all know it’s 5 o’clock somewhere, so I intend to toast them as I watch them go, even if it’s dawn.
I only hope the old fart didn’t mix up “rapture” with “rupture,” about which I bet he has intimate acquaintance.