Presidential Erections

Oh, enough already.  I’ve lost count, but I think we’re at four — four women announcing to the world that Republican wannabe candidate Herman “Raisin” Cain inappropriately unsheathed his sword of lust in their direction.

I’m  convinced.  I had my doubts him, but clearly these incidents stamp the man as genuine presidential material.

The fact is, in power circles like Washington DC, this sort of interaction is commonplace.  Women fuck their way up the ladder all the time.  The smart ones don’t waste their efforts on mid-level pretenders, either.  If there were four (and counting), it sounds to me like these women, at least, recognized genuine leadership when it reached out (or at least squirted) at them.

If you trust women, and acknowledge their shrewd capacity to take the true measure of a man, then you have to agree that the Herminator has what it takes, even if none of the four (so far) actually got herself wet.

Why is he denying it?  What’s he ashamed of?  It’s very simple: he worked very hard to achieve the position of power where strange pussy would be his on demand.  So he demanded it, authenticating his credentials.  A lesser mortal would never have placed himself in this commanding position.  But our Sperminator seized the day!

No “marching the Appalachian trail;” “I gotta wide stance;” or “I did not have sex with that woman” for our Herman.

Reports indicate that Bill Clinton, who played a few rounds on this course, is purple with envy — here’s this hamburger and pizza pie magnate waving his willie at women who by comparison bring out the inner pig in Paula Jones and Monica Lewinsky (to name just two).  Clinton, I remind you, served two full terms, although one of them ended with him sleeping alone on the couch.

Poor Herman the Vermin.  You’d think a guy with a slogan like Nein Nein Nein would know how that translates into English  without this kind of all-too-public instruction.  Ah, well.  He’ll have oodles of down time to mull it over.  Stick a fork in the burger man, he’s done.

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This entry was posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to Presidential Erections

  1. Cain was CEO of Godfather’s Pizza …….never a hamburger guy. Obciously Cain was not ‘abel’ to do beef. And it seems that his favorite pizza came with sausage.

    The mistake yoo make, Opal Esk, is that the Executive musical instrument that blows, Whore-Monica , and all the others said ‘yes’, these gals with Sugah Cain said NO . Apples and oranges, my friend…though I did hear Cain was applying to be womens volleyball coach at Penn State,

    • Ted Williams' Head says:

      Funny comment.
      Cain worked for Burger King before he became a sausage roller. Evidently he thinks his women should be served up as hot, fast, and cheap as his food.
      He’s a perfect Republican spokesman, one of those guys that wants to run government — and his sex life — like a business.

  2. Mumblety Peg says:

    Men are such pigs.

    • Diesel Fitter says:

      You want real pigs, Peg? Look at those Clinton bimbo eruptions. Gaak.

      When I think back to the Kennedy boys handing off Marilyn Monroe to one another……damn. What happened to American exceptionalism?

  3. Piles says:

    Hey at least he has a birth certificate. I guess.

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