Whole New Meaning to “Boobs”

Dottie Lux, a professional clown who performs in San Francisco, says people often come up to her and say, “I’ve always been afraid of clowns, but I love you.” Lux’s act calls for her to take off her clothes. She’s part of a growing nightclub subculture called Clown Burlesque, emerging in cities like London and Detroit, that thrills audiences with suggestive clown dances and strategically placed pink-balloon pasties. Some clowns worry about long-term consequences. David Magidson, who has toured with Ringling Brothers Circus, says a 6-year-old’s accidental exposure to a near-naked clown with balloon breasts could result in “kids having to see therapists for the rest of their lives.” — NYTimes

As a child I never much cared for clowns, and growing older, the only thing that’s changed is I like them even less.  It’s not just that they remind me of Congress, what with their stupid antics, childish posturing, and deliberate put-ons, it’s that I find what they do basically unfunny or meaningful.  I just don’t get it.

Mimes still make me crazy.  When they pull up within range, I set my jaw, avoid all eye contact, and clench my fists.

And then there’s Clowns for Jesus.   No, this isn’t the Westboro Baptist Church crowd or Pat Robertson, but I get the point.

All that duly documented, I’d give Dottie Lux a and her naked ilk chance.  Depending on its body, a nude clown might be worth a look and even a giggle.  We’re not talking about Clarabelle or Krusty, are we?  Or Congress.  <shiver/>

What is certainly worth a horse-laugh is that comment about a clown with balloon breasts unhinging kids for the rest of their lives.  Inevitably, some clueless knob offers this viewpoint, a combination of hysterical  “It’s bad for kids!!  It’ll hurt the kids!!  We love our kids!!” and the kind of pseudo-scientific pap that psychologists pedal for profit.  What doesn’t have the capacity to send kids to therapists, especially when those same therapists have a financial interest in convincing gullible parents that their services are as essential top their precious little darlings as food and water and a Junior iPhone?  Leeches and parasites.

Q:  What has a big red nose and lives in a test tube?

A:   Happy the Clone.

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8 Responses to Whole New Meaning to “Boobs”

  1. Jesus often dressed as a clown to scare the shit out of kids, despite the urban legend that he “loved the little children.”

  2. Merkin Way says:

    “Clowns for Jesus” sounds redundant to me. If they’re FOR Jesus, they’re CLOWNS for Jesus.

    “Make a joyful noise” and all that.

  3. Neil, a Christian Soul says:

    The mission of the ministry known as Clowns for Jesus is to share the Word of God, which is the mission of every church, but their specialty is their method, which is to inspire joy and fun through their family-friendly antics and appearance and style. They have nothing to do with Dottie Lux or the obscene side show called clown burlesque.

    Your disparaging remarks, and those in the two comments above, reveal not just ignorance but malice, the work of Satan. I will pray for you, but you’re going to hell.

    • Neil, did you only read the Old Testament with it’s vengeful God?
      As a fellow Christian and a Deacon of The Church Of England I favor a God of forgiveness.

      By the way dear chap HOW MANY TIMES can I be sent to Hell.

      London, UK

  4. mkhall says:

    You’d probably enjoy the BDSM antics of Ouchy the Clown.

  5. a wiccan want to know says:

    Hey Neil…..if you pray for squats but you think he’s still going to go to hell, then why bother? Obviously God is too busy to listen to you. Perhaps you should honor the Goddess instead.

  6. julesagray says:

    You’re all a bunch of godless twats.

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