The carnival called the national Republican primary season is heading our way, fellow Floridians, and you will be well advised to brace yourself for the numbing media onslaught that has already started. If you’re registered R, your phone will ring constantly. If you watch teevee, you’ll be blinded by bared teeth, red white and blue imagery, and leering analysts making a mockery of journalism on an hourly basis. If radio is your preferred medium, prepare to turn down the volume.
The contests in Iowa, New Hampshire, and South Carolina were damn near meaningless, as the populations are small and insular, not representative of any voting trend other than their own, which don’t add up to much. In SC, 60% of registered ‘Pubs identify themselves as evangelical Christians. They reside in small towns where the Ten Commandments are displayed at McDonalds. As HL Mencken once marveled years ago, the Carolinas are a place where even the High Episcopals handle snakes at worship.
Funny guy, that Mencken and man could we use him today.
Newton Leroy Gingrich appeals to the lower instincts of the ‘Pub hordes, the voters who unwrinkle at hollered epithets like “Food Stamp President!” and “Liberal media elites!” and “Political correctness!” His maniacal, full-front attack on Mittney’s Bain Capital career was so ignorant and off the mark that even the pro-business Wall Street Journal and Club For Growth told him to roll it back and shut up. “This is the sort of attack on the capitalist system we would expect from Obama and his people,” they sniffed, irritably. Really, fellas? Find me evidence of that attack. This wasn’t anything to do with BHO, just bile from your favorite fat-faced bomb thrower working his way to the nomination.
We’ve seen this act before, and it ends badly. Mittens will remind Florida’s faithful that as Speaker, Gangreengich barely survived a coup d’état staged by his own party. He is unstable and unreliable, a sanctimonious hypocrite with a short fuse and a big mouth. It’s all great fun, but no substitute for leadership, even among ‘Pubs who seriously offered the world a Vice President Sarah Palin. Florida’s vote will reflect this sentiment.
On the plus side, we don’t have to endure Rick Perry, who is headed home. I found this amusing:
“I am concerned that the unfortunate results of Perry’s performance on the national stage may confirm the stereotype that much of the rest of the country has about Texas — the impression that Texas is a bunch of yahoos and people of low intelligence,” said Scott Caven, a Houston Republican who was Mr. Perry’s state finance chairman in his first two campaigns for governor. NYTimes
I don’t share this thoughtful ‘Pub operative’s concern — nothing Rick Perry said or did in the spotlight of national media out-performed Monkey Boy’s bozoic antics during his eight bumbling years in the White House from which the nation is still recovering. The damage had been done before he ventured out, and his own contributions are relatively minor. Perry is simply a footnote, or a foot-in-mouth-note, and back home where he blends in with the loudmouthed hinds for which his state and party are famous he’ll be welcomed warmly.
I suspect Team Gingrinch will not fare as well in Florida as it did in South Carolina, and that Mittney’s well-oiled and high financed campaign machinery will prevail, resetting the direction of the race back to what passes for reason among the ‘Pubs. (Santorum and Paul are mere distractions. Even ‘Pubs don’t take them seriously.) Florida will be the turning point, which is disappointing in a way, because it marks the end of the great entertainment, and the beginning of hidebound national politics as usual.
Meanwhile will somebody please just slap Callista? Or fling some animal feces her way? She has to be the most annoying candidate’s spouse since….since….well, since Bill Clinton. Speaking of animal feces.