Monthly Archives: May 2012

Cheeky

I’m at the Liquor and Rubber Balls Sports Bar and Nail Emporium tonight watching the Phillies play the Mets in between tall draughts of  Anchor Steam Beer, which is unbelievably smooth and flavorful even after the fifth one.  Sixth one.  … Continue reading

Posted in Playing With Balls | 6 Comments

Porn Rocks

Ooh la la. Researchers have discovered illustrations of female anatomy in a rock shelter in France that date back 37,000 years. It is “the oldest evidence of any kind of graphic imagery,” said Randall White, an anthropologist at New York … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment | 3 Comments

Dissing Disco

In the wake of the demise of Donna Summers and the Bee Gees’ Robin Gibb, Joe Cardona of the Miami Hurled penned quite possibly the single most ignorant and poorly reasoned commentary on disco….ever! Fortunately, very few people even bother … Continue reading

Posted in News From the Nation's Dicktip | 9 Comments

Poll Cat

So intense is my concentration on the porn sequence playing out on the screen that when the telephone rings, I absently answer it.  (The phone, not the porn.)   Multi-tasking ain’t my thing.  My idea of multi-tasking is reading on the … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment, Shaken and Stirred | 4 Comments

These Sighs

The dreaded day arrives.  I wash my face, wipe my ass, clothe myself, and drive to the Lauderdale Lakes office of the Division of Motor Vehicles.  There’s no getting around it.  I need to renew my driver’s license. “It rained … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 8 Comments

Credit Where Credit Is Dude

Headin’ outta town.  Gotta buy some airplane tix.  Check a few websites, find the best deal.  Book the flights.  Go to pay — and my American Express card is rejected. This hasn’t happened to me since President Alzheimer was semi-coherent.  … Continue reading

Posted in Shaken and Stirred | 7 Comments

Physicians: Gag Thyselves

I just hate it when physicians attempt to reason.  Few of them are innately capable, and their training discourages it.   Here’s further proof: In a controversial finding that will affect at least 44 million American men, a government task force … Continue reading

Posted in Gen. Snark, Maj. Snafu, Corp. Punishment, Shaken and Stirred | 5 Comments