My best guess is that by the time you read this Guido and I will have already voted: our plan is to get to the polling station half an hour before it opens at 7:00. Get this shit out of the way early.
We tried to early-vote — twice. Both times there were lines out the door, down the block, and around the corner. ‘Crats and ‘Pubs might tolerate this, but it’s no way to treat a card-carrying member of the Green Party like myself. After all, we’re damn near extinct. Although we are backing Oliver Kofoid for the Monroe County Mosquito Control Board. Ollie 4 Bug Board!!
My biggest fear is that it won’t end tomorrow. That the number of clusterfucks, lawsuits, incidents of violence or shady activities combine to postpone a declared outcome. This would be the ‘Pubs’ nuclear option — the campaign falls short, measures to suppress minority and other undesirable votes fail, Paul Lyin’s lobotomy didn’t stop his drooling — let’s just scramble the pieces, upset the board, and steal what we can when nobody’s watching.
(Hey — it worked in 2000. But don’t blame me — I voted for Nader.)
All eyes turn to Florida again. The Supreme Court, shoulders sagging, jaws set, prepares to sift through knee-deep legal sputum to appoint another winner. Gov Dickwithears is exiled. Hugo Chavez offers to send peacemakers, observers, and humanitarian aid. Some bumblefuck mid-state pastor burns a Koran.
Make it stop.
And just remember — when it’s all over at last, either BHO or Mittney is President for four years! No matter the outcome, this fairy tale’s ending is Grimm.