Considering a cruise this winter?
A ghost ship carrying nothing but disease-ridden rats could be about to make land on Britain’s shore, experts have warned.
Experts say the ship, which is likely to still contain hundreds of rats that have been eating each other to survive, must still be out there somewhere because not all of its lifeboat emergency beacons have been set off. — indepedendent.co.uk
“Unbelievable sales!” one agent gushed. “Every zombie wannabe, goth, yobbo, and garden variety cannibal wants a piece of this one. That’s a lot of people — why, in Germany alone, it’s half the population!”
Here in the States, executives from Carnival Cruise Lines dismiss the disease-ridden rat-infested ocean liner as “derivative and out of style.”
“We’ve had entire ships filled with flu-ridden and food-poisoned passengers by the thousands,” a spokescritter told the media. “We’ve stranded our clients in the Gulf for days with nothing but seawater and plastic furniture to sustain them. A ship full of rats? Big deal. That’s like so 17th century.”
As an enhancement to the experience, Captain Francesco Schettino, currently facing trial for his role in running the cruise ship Casta Concordia aground off the coast of Italy, is expected to join the Cannibal Rat Cruise crew in an advisory role.