The two young lovers were arguing at their hutch place in Boynton Beach. He told her something along the lines of, “It’s a man’s world,” to which she took exception. Not since the days of Socratic dialogs have there been such thoughtful profundities. But then —
The argument grew more heated, and… she retreated into her bedroom and told him the relationship was over.
Then she heard high-pitched screaming from the living room, and she walked in to find [her boyfriend] abusing one of her pet rabbits, Bun Bun.
[The woman] said the man punched and choked Bun Bun until blood poured from the rabbit’s eyes, and she said Wertz dropped the animal after she confronted him.
Whoa! A vicious rabbit punch and down goes Bun Bun! Down goes Bun Bun! But there might be a better explanation — maybe he was just trying to do a Friedman Test and got sloppy.
The rabbit had burst blood vessels in its eyes, and [might never] regain full vision. The other rabbit suffered some soft-tissue trauma, and both animals are being treated with medication.
Thank god for ObamaCare. Meanwhile, 42 plaintiffs’ attorneys (so far) have sent letters or emails promoting their services. One firm, Carrot & Stick, P.A., was represented by an emailer who gave the name “Stew.” This one is suspicious.
Besides, why is this news? “Man Beats Bunny” isn’t news. “Bunny Beats Man” — now that’s news.
I’m a bit suspicious myself. She reported hearing screams — do rabbits scream? Or was he doing the screaming? And as long as we’re asking questions, what’s invisible and smells like carrots? Free beer to the first commenter with the right answer.