SWLABR

We are comfortably seated at the Conch Republic bar, sufficiently distant from the screeching duet perched outside on the patio where we’d prefer to be. But I dislike screaming to be heard with my mouth full, and after all, we’re there for dinner. Raw oysters, chowder, the usual.

Guido works a lot of puzzles — crosswords, cryptograms, nasty mind-teasers I want no part of, etc. Me, I’m a master at Jumbles, probably because with my screwed-up eyesight, the unique way I see the world invites scrambling spatial objects, including signs. E.g., I can’t see the logo for Beltone as anything but “Belt One.”

barThis large sign over the sign at the bar stumped us both. We worked at it for a while, sucking down draft Yuenglings with our oysters, and finally gave up. We asked the bartender to interpret.

She glanced at the sign, sighed, and said “Okay — but if I tell you, will you buy the bartenders a round?”

Sure we will. You got it.

She smiled, walked away for a moment, then returned. “Let’s try this again,” she said. “If I Tell You Will You Buy The Bartenders A Round?

We laughed for ten minutes and left her a big tip. I love Key West.

Extra Credit — free drink for the first one to explain the relevance of the title of this post. Musicians may not apply.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in News From the Nation's Dicktip. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to SWLABR

  1. Whack-a-mole says:

    “She Walks (Was) Like a Bearded Rainbow,” by Cream, in — was it ’68?

    Although, I preferred “Mairzy doats and dozy doats and liddle lamzy divey . . .”

  2. Ted End says:

    How do you even pronounce that without spitting or drooling?

    • Kent Standit says:

      Ted, having read your comments over the years, I wonder how you can say *any*thing without spitting or drooling, including your name.

  3. Fran G'Panni says:

    Funny — I’ve stood in that bar many times and don’t remember the sign. Then again, sometimes I don’t remember standing in the bar, either. Great seeing you and Guido again: don’t wait until September next time, okay?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s